Universal karma: 1

So, sometimes karma comes quickly.  I'm certain the knock on the door of the young man I put in jail today came not only quickly, but completely unexpectedly.  

You see, this young man thought it would be a great idea to destroy several classrooms of a not-for-profit school for the mentally and physically handicapped.   Pissed off yet?  Every fire extinguisher had been emptied onto pieces of artwork and clothing.  The refrigerator contents were smeared over every surface imaginable and the sink was stopped up and the room completely flooded.  Nice.  

All of the wonderful people and students at the school cheered as I did my investigation.  It just warmed my heart and infuriated me all at the same time.  Why?  Why pick on people who already have a difficult time in life?  

Needless to say, I took great pleasure in paying him a visit today.  What do you think the punishment for something like this should be?  I've thought about it and I think about 200 hours of community service at the school, planting flowers, sweeping floors and washing the transportation van would suffice.  

Thoughts?

It is a sad day for the city of Oakland and police officers throughout the country.  These four officers were gunned down by a parole-violator in two related shooting incidents.  Sgt. Dunakin, Sgt. Sakai and Sgt. Romans were killed in the attack.  Ofc. Hege is battling for his life. 

Please keep the families in your thoughts and remember that even though we are the guys who issue tickets, we are also the ones who allow you and your family to sleep well at night.  

Rest in eternal peace, my brothers. 

Today. 

Enjoy a little piece of my Thursday.  

Ahh...Scotland.  I love ye.  

Scottish Parliament has found unanimously to re-examine the Marriage Act of 1977.  All members found it to be hypocritical and against modern thinking.  How refreshing!  

With a large population of agnostics and pagan-influenced religions, Scottish leaders feel a need to "encompass the whole of society" in this legislation supporting gay marriage.  Both religious and non-religious groups are being asked for evidence in support of this amendment--and if not in support of it, reasons WHY.  

It is amazing to me that the U.S. continues to battle this matter of human rights solely in the light of religion.  The division of church and state in this day and age is as convoluted as it was 50 years ago.  

Kudos to the Scots for getting it right.  A wee house on the moors sounds mighty appealing right now...

Dear God, 

I tried really hard to stay away from Thin Mints this season.  I made it all the way until the last day of sales when I saw two Girl Scouts outside of the local supermarket.  They looked so sad.  They had leftover cookies that they couldn't sell and it was time to go home for dinner.  

I thought about all of the work I've done in the gym and debated the pros and cons of minty goodness that awaited inside that damn green box.  Sorry--darn green box.  I calculated the following: 

(treadmill exertion) (calories burned) /cookies consumed = lots of extra effort

And then I did another calculation: 

(1 box of thin mints) (mental stability offered by chocolate) / guilt = it's worth the risk

So, I broke down and bought a box.  I have now realized that one box of Thin Mints equals two servings.  And, going to the gym after consuming 30 cookies is a really, really, bad idea.  Thanks for not making me toss 4 dollars worth of my cookies.  

Amen. 

Calm down, sister.

My last post plus coffee plus a really long day got my dander up.  

Despite my dislike of Florida in general, her sunsets always make me smile.  Ohmmm...

Greedy bastards

So, AIG has dolled out millions to their corporate minions despite being given 180 billion in taxpayer money.  Their reasoning is based upon assumptions that the jugheads at the top of the ladder are "the best in the biz" and would otherwise walk away, effectively leaving AIG stranded and unable to function.   These bonuses are meant to quell any thoughts of abandonment and satiate the masses of upper-level white collar whiners.  

Please. 

Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner took umbrage and told AIG's chairman Edward Liddy to renegotiate the deal.  Liddy declined and stated that AIG was legally obligated to go through with the payments.  Legally obligated because they were "promised" to the execs LAST YEAR.  

Last year, AIG was a huge player on Wall Street.  Now, they are on the brink of collapse.  How does a corporation with no capital, no equity, no stability and no balance have our federal government and America's taxpayers over a barrel?  Why are those appointed to speak for the masses being such pushovers?  What's the worst thing that can happen?  AIG takes a dive and people lose more money?  I think we, the people, are pretty used to that at this point.  

I'm sick and tired of my hard-earned money going into the pockets of these scam artists.  We need to open our eyes.  I just want to live my middle-class life and have some fun along the way.  These bastards already have more money than God.  Our values must change.  Instead of emphasizing who has what, we should be focusing on who helps who.  

There was another Liddy in history who, by the way, was also an asshole.  Gordon Liddy, the mastermind of the Watergate burglary.  

If I ever get a pit bull, I'm naming it Liddy.  Or better yet, a hog.  

Spin the Wheel

This water wheel is one of my places of solace.  The gentle sounds and continuous rotation lull me into a quiet place amidst the hustle and bustle of St. George Street.  It seems as though these little hideaways have come in quite handy as of late; places where I can escape all of the bad news circulating through the newswire.  I think we all need our retreats, whether they be figurative or actual.  Unfortunately, many people I speak with have said that their particular choice of escape lies in a cocktail glass.  If that's the case, wine and liquor sales should be a surefire boost to the economy.  I don't think my investment portfolio will change to reflect that particular forecast, but hey, whatever works for you.  

I am hopeful that our country will soon come full circle, like the wheel.  As long as my metaphor doesn't replace the water with money.  Water-- we've got.  

The search continues

Satsuma, Florida:  On February 9, 2009, 5 year-old Haleigh Cummings disappeared from her home in the middle of the night without a trace.  Time and again, Misty Croslin, the 17-year old girlfriend of father Ronald Cummings, has changed her story about where the child was sleeping just prior to her disappearance.  Misty's recount of the supposed abduction states that she woke up to use the restroom and in the two minutes she was away, Haleigh was snatched from her bed by an unknown assailant.  Now, Ronald and Misty have tied the knot, effectively circumventing any possibility of testimony against one-another via spousal exclusion.  

I've contemplated Misty's outright complacence since the start of this investigation and now I'm predicting a bombshell.  I have my doubts about the well-being of this child, which is catastrophic in itself, along with my gut feeling that Misty knows exactly where she is and what happened.  

We may never know the whole story.  It is my sincere hope that Haleigh is located and safely returned home.  

Sesame Street recession woes

That's right.  Big Bird, et. al. are suffering cutbacks from this abysmal economy.  The Children's Television Workshop has cut 67 positions from the show due to the recession.  Okay...Lehman Bros., Circuit City and Linens 'n Things have filed Chapter 11, which I can live with.  Start screwing with Sesame Street and I feel a sequel of "Children of the Corn" in the making.  Kindergartners everywhere will take up arms and march across the plains in search of investment bankers' blood. 

What next?  Will Snuffelupagus go on unemployment?  Will Oscar the Grouch have to refinance his garbage can--and is it backed by the F-Macs?  Will Ernie and Bert's rent skyrocket, effectively kicking them out of their sublet?  Perhaps Grover could sing a ditty about financial scheming, greed and forced foreclosure.  Nah.  Not many words rhyme with 'foreclosure'.  (Disclosure, composure, indecent exposure?)

This message brought to you by the letter "B".  As in Bullshit.